Welcome to the Chaos Palace!

Here's what we're gonna do here.

Well, hello there! I’m so glad to be writing this initial post. Welcome to the Chaos Palace is a project I’ve been daydreaming about for a while now—and it’s finally happening! My aim is for this to be a space where folks gather online for some mind-opening, questioning, and compassion-seeking discourse.

If you, like me, are looking for an online watering hole for folks whose day-to-day is more bedlam than idyll, this place is for you. Especially if you, like me, actually think life is better when it’s messier¹. I mean, all those lovely Pinterest boards full of neatly labeled pantries and exquisite toddler activities are fine. I’m not against them per se. They have little, if anything, to do with my life, though.

At our house, affectionately called the Chaos Palace (hence the name of this here Substack), we make rainbow pasta and get covered in food dye. We yodel at cherry trees. We have wild meltdowns. One or more of us is on the verge of a sensory overwhelm every few days. We run down the sidewalks of Brooklyn like a colony of bats outta hell screaming “let’s gooooo!” in capes and sunglasses.

We like it that way.

And I have a growing suspicion that there are other wonderful weirdos out there who’d agree with me. In fact, I’ve had the pleasure of speaking with quite a few of them during my years writing for various publications. The thing is, though, that being a weirdo² isn’t really click-bait-ey material³ unless you’re being truly absurd, like blowing up your own personal space rocket or something. That’s not what we’re doing here.

So what are we doing?

We’re sharing stories about outside-the-box ways of life. We’re thinking critically about the rules that govern us, that dictate how and why we live. We’re answering one another’s questions (respectfully) and helping to shed those rules.

We’re leaning into our authentic, true selves. Whatever the heck that means.

But how?

I don’t know! It’s an adventure! That’s the fun!

But here’s the plan. Every Friday you’ll get an update from our little Chaos Palace on how my wife, my kids, and I are stumbling down the rocky road of life. You’ll also get reading and music recommendations, because Lord we need good music and words these days. That’s totally free.

Paid subscribers will also get

• Q&As with interesting folks who are life-ing off the beaten track in some way every other Monday

• Invitations to chat with other community members every Wednesday about various topics that help us explore our chaotic selves

• Reported essays from moi about queerness, having ADHD, parenting a differently wired kid, compelling trends I’m seeing in the world, and anything else that’s both important and mind-expanding.

Sure, okay, sounds cool. What now?

For the next couple of days I’ll be adding a few old essays to the archive, so keep an eye out for those. This Friday, I’ll send out the first This Week at the Chaos Palace newsletter to all free subscribers.

On Monday, May 8, paid subscribers will get their first Q&A (it’s an exciting one! eek!), On June 1, paid subscribers will get their first reported essay (a Pride themed one, of course), and topic discussion threads will kick off next Wednesday, May 3.

And that’s it. We’ll rock n’ roll from there on out.

I’m so excited! As evidenced by the sheer volume of exclamation points in this message!

So… see you around?

1. Most of the time. Unless the messiness is something truly infuriating or endangering.

2. I’m reclaiming this word! Weird is good!

3. Making them harder to get hired to write.